Want to Make a Change in Your Life? Here is a Start
If you want something different, do something different!
No change will result from taking the same road, doing the same job, espousing the same attitude, and taking the same action.
If you aren’t happy with your results, here are 3 simple steps to take to make a change.
1. Take responsibility for wherever you are, then find the issue that is keeping you from happiness
From the Dare to Lose program that we are doing with Miramont Lifestyle Fitness to a meeting with a bunch of people who get into big trouble if they drink alcohol, all of the problems that I face and see other people face are something different than what it looks like on the surface.
I have a drinking problem. However, alcohol is not the problem. Over use of alcohol is the symptom of the problem. My issue is one that is so deep that I choose to put the dreaded ‘ic’ on the end of the word alcohol, so even if I come to grips with my deep, Freudian, Jungian, or Dr. Bob-ian issues, I still don’t have any plans to celebrate with scotch. For me alcohol is problematic, but alcohol is not the problem. I am the problem. If I just point to alcohol as a victimizing substance that can ruin my life, I won’t make any progress. There is more going on. It’s hard to figure out what it is, but a worthwhile pursuit nonetheless.
So, step one is taking full responsibility, and then doing the best we can to identify what our real issues are. This becomes a lifetime pursuit, and if you don’t have the gumption to sign up for this, you might not have what it takes to make a real change in your life.
2. Establish a Vision
One of my favorite teachers, Marshall Thurber, asks a question in many of his classes.
What is one word that can define leadership?
He then goes around the room, and people say all sorts of things. Strength, fearlesseness, expertise, ambition, etc. The first time he asked me, I said vision (for which I got partial credit, a nod of the head from the instructor).
The answer is simple. Prediction. Leaders predict what is going to happen, and they prepare their company, group, family, geographic population or other followers accordingly.
Steve Jobs and Bill Gates predicted computers would be important.
Andrew Carnegie predicted that steel would play an important role in the late 19th and early 20th century.
The owner of this website and my radio station, TRI 102.5 (along with hundreds of others), Steven Price, had an interesting prediction. He thought that if we just take people who are already creating content for the radio, teach them how to do the same thing for the internet and have them create a lot of great local content, plus use the airwaves to promote our websites, we should have great succcess.
That was in 2009. At the end of 2013, we had over 40 million monthly visits to our sites nationwide. We went from zero views to 10 million monthly in one year. Pretty good prediction.
So, what is your vision? What do you predict will make you and your family happy? What kind of work is it? How much money do you make? How much do you weigh? How much time do you spend at work? What would you like to do with your free time.
See it. Create it. Write it down. Crystallize that vision. Then, obsess over it.
3. Start Moving Toward the Vision
Here is the great ‘Phoenix analogy’ from Jerry and Esther Hicks. If you start moving toward Phoenix, and you never stop that effort, you will eventually get to Phoenix. No matter where you are, no matter how far away, no matter what is between you and Phoenix, if you put solid effort into getting to Phoenix every day, think of nothing but getting to Phoenix, do nothing besides work on getting to Phoenix, or even work on getting to Phoenix part time, eventually, you will end up in Phoenix. That’s a promise.
The same can be true for your vision. If you work on nothing but your vision, you will watch it manifest around you faster than you ever thought possible.
Note – This is a good time to implement what one of my partners coined as ‘adaptive persistence’. Not every vision that you create will be perfect, so knowing what idea you should be willing to die for and what, after some failure, is a bad idea is key.
If we release an attack dog on 5 fleeing people, but only one of them is a criminal, that dog may not choose properly when it sinks its teeth into the first one it catches, but you can be sure it will hold on tight and not let go. Sometimes, we have to let go of our vision, because while we may love it, it doesn’t jive with really taking us where we want to be. Don’t be an attack dog. Be willing to change and adapt. But don’t be willing to give up on your dream.
Another way my partner likes to describe this situation is like this.
I was so focused on making a million I walked right by the opportunity to make ten million.
A laser focus is good, as long as it’s focused on the right project for you at the time.