You know those weird shoes that look exactly like a foot?

They came out very recently, along with a 'minimalist' running fad. People began believing that running in bare feet, or as close to it as possible, was the way to go.

The idea was that we lived for millions of years without shoes, so our bodies might react well to taking the sole out from between our bodies and the ground.

Many people swore by it, and the company that created the shoes that supported the fad apparently used this idea in their advertising.

Now, without admitting any type of fault or wrongdoing, Vibram USA Inc., maker of the glovelike FiveFingers running shoes that have separate spaces for each toe will pay a settlement. According to the Wall Street Journal Online, "they will pay a total of $3.75 million to people who bought the shoes and said it would stop making health claims in its advertisements."

That's all fine and well, but the reason these shoes should never have taken off isn't because of false claims. It's because they are hideous.


I remember seeing a female friend in them and thinking 'She looks like Bigfoot'. She may not have thought so, but I'll bet she didn't wake up that morning and think 'I'm hoping my outfit will remind people of a Yeti today.'

I have never seen anyone look good in these shoes. They were so repellant to me, that I, very uncharacteristically, never even looked into them to see if they would be good for me. This is strange because I am into footgear...especially performance footgear. The right shoe can make a sport playable, and a lack of can make it unplayable.

I wear huge, clunky, robotic looking ski boots. Bubbly snowboard boots. Neoprene water shoes. Velcro bike shoes. It's function before fashion for me in so many situations. That's why I was suprised at myself when I couldn't get past the look of these horrendous shoes.

Sometimes it reminded me of bigfoot. Another time I saw a guy wearing them, and everytime I looked at him, I thought, 'monkey'. If you are into the simian look, these shoes are for you.

I didn't even care if they were better. The look precluded me from wearing them.

So as they fade away, it's just another fad I'm glad I didn't fall for.